Our picture is, pretty much, what the industry describes as a “no-budget” feature. Through crowdfunding we’ve acquired backers/producers from all over the world, but we’ve raised nowhere near the amount that I originally wanted for the picture’s budget – but, we’re getting it done anyway – because we want this picture made.
I AM NOT A FILMMAKER
I’m not quite sure I would call myself a “filmmaker”. If the act of simply making a film counts, then sure. But when I think of the term filmmaker, I think of people like Scorsese, Kubrick, Coppola, Russell, Soderbergh, Jarmusch, and the like. Sure, I’ve directed online shorts, an award-winning web series, and for the stage, but I’ve never made an actual feature film until now. Those guys are proven. I am not. I guess the real point I’m making is that I haven’t proven anything to myself, most importantly, as far as putting a feature film out into the world to live on its own. So, I’m going to think of myself not as a “filmmaker”, per se, but as a “documenter of my own experience”.
With that said, making a movie is hard. Very hard. Super-hard. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. And while I could be making the worst movie in the history of mankind (which isn’t actually true, because I saw a truly horrific full-length film online the other night which may qualify), the fact is I feel good doing it, and I know I’ll feel even better when it’s finally, as they say, “in the can.” Nobody tells you how hard it’s going to be. Well, some do, but it’s truly something you have to figure out for yourself – or with others straggling along with you on your exhausting journey to put a ninety-minute slice-of-life out to any kind of audience you can trick into mistaking your blood, sweat, tears, and intrinsic failure, for an actual “real” movie. Here’s the thing: As Kevin Smith puts it, “Every movie is someone’s favorite movie.” And, he’s right. So, you don’t have to be a “filmmaker” to make a movie. You just have to be willing to let yourself make a film.
HATERS GONNA HATE
One thing I’ve come to realize is that no matter who you are or what you do you will always have haters. In today’s age of technology, anyone can make a flick. Anyone. Seriously. Over the course, so far, of making this picture I’ve come to understand that the majority of my haters out there hate me because I am doing something they wish they could do, or had the support to do, but somehow they are not doing it at all. These people don’t even have to know anything at all about me, but they hate me with a passion.
The best words of encouragement I can give to someone dealing with all the hate is to acknowledge it, note it, and shake it off. Ultimately, those people who are not supportive of you have their own issues they need to deal with. And the best thing you can do for yourself, and your picture, is to keep that in perspective. The hate doesn’t have anything to do with you. Thousands of people are working on movies everyday, and they don’t hate them – they hate you. So, suck it up, brush it off, and shoot your flick. The old saying is true: “Haters gonna hate.”
SURROUND YOURSELF WITH LIKE-MINDED PEOPLE (Yes, even your friends.)
There’s always that old mantra to never do business with your friends. Horseshit. Your friends are the ones who still believe in you, even when they’ve seen what an idiot you can sometimes be. And, chances are, they are like you in their tastes. If you like art, they probably do too. These are the people who have held your hair when you puked, carried you to your front door when your broke your leg on the ice, bitched-out your ex for making you cry in front of your entire class. These people love you and want you to be successful, at least intrinsically for yourself. These are the people that have your back. Not having them around would be more of a handicap than having them there.
The same goes for people you are bringing into your little world that is your picture. They should be able to see the process, and your ideas as something they can get on-board with – even knowing that things will almost never go according to plan. The better someone is at their craft, and the more you surround yourself with them, the more they will push you to be better at yours. The great thing about these people is they will ultimately become your friends. You will bond, share histories, news, and make memories that you’ll always remember. This is a collaborative process, this making a film thing – so surround yourself with those people you trust, enjoy, and dedicate your time to making the best movie you can with them. If anything, you’ll always have something to talk about later in life.
“NEEDING” VS. “WANTING” – What to shoot. (And being resourceful.)
The most important thing I’m learning, by making this flick, is that I can’t let anyone tell me that I can’t do it. Don’t ever let anyone tell you you can’t do something. That’s not up to them to decide. There are going to be plenty of times during production that you’ll look at yourself, your project, your cast and crew (or lack thereof), and you’ll want to pull your hair out. But you have to step back, and look at the big picture and be resourceful.
For example, one shooting day we had called for 100-150 extras for a scene. Four people showed up. Four. At first I, obviously, was mad, hysterical, and annoyed. But, after calming myself down a bit, I stepped back and really looked at what I “needed” to shoot as opposed to what I “wanted” to shoot. My story is a very intimate one. It’s about the central characters, not about how many people attended the graduation ceremony I was attempting to shoot that day. So, instead of “wanting” to shoot 150 people, I realized I only “needed” to shoot a handful – those involved in the story. With some careful camera placement, and some added sound, I was able to cut a scene that’s visually about the core participants, but it still sounds like there is 150 people present.
When you’re working with no budget, “wanting” something isn’t always an option, and maybe it won’t even make your story any better. You just have to be able to step back and realize that your picture isn’t always going to turn out exactly the way you want it, and will almost never be exactly what is on the page.
NOT EVERYONE IS GOING TO GET BEHIND YOU
Just as the haters will hate, not everyone you talk to or email is going to get on-board with your crazy little indie film idea. In fact, most people will tell you how cool an idea it is to your face, then blast away at their friends about it later. They’ll be willing to “help out” in any way they can, but then seem to fall off the face of the planet when you’re actually in need of a hand on set, or call for a bunch of extras. This will happen with the most organized of productions to the chaotic ones. Here’s the thing, though: You can’t expect them to. You can’t expect everyone to be excited about your project, your work (and some people will say it isn’t work because you’re not getting paid – or paid very little). They all have their own lives to live, and errands to run, and babies to feed. So, again, you have to suck it up and do the best you can with what you have.
I would say that 95% of directing this first feature of mine has been the art of problem-solving. The other 5% is the shooting, and the fun stuff. Whether it be logistics, scheduling, props, lighting, it’s solving problems that will consume most of your time. Not that all of those things are the director’s responsibility on larger-budget sets, but when you’re making your first feature I think it’s imperative that the director take on most of the responsibility them self. Why? Because I think it’s a great learning process for future projects if you take responsibility for the things that don’t work, and take the praise for the things that do. This way, your first picture is truly, undeniably, yours.
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